Total Medals Earned: 130 (From 26 different games.) Total Medal Score: 1,720 Points
Medals Earned: 5/50 (25/500 points)
Die.
Complete the tutorial
Start playing!
Enter the tower
Defeat 1 enemy
Defeat Xenon on Moon 0
Defeat Xenon on Moon 1
Defeat Xenon on Moon 2
Defeat Xenon on Moon 3
Defeat Xenon on Moon 4
Defeat Xenon on Moon 5
Reach the top of the tower
Find all the *totally adorbs* outfits :3
Brandish the Tank
Defeat an enemy using salt and pepper
Defeat the Sheriff
Defeat Xenon on Moon 6
Defeat Xenon on Moon 7
Defeat Camlaidh
Defeat Xenon with your bare hands
Reach halfway through the tower
Survive death
Die by eating an artichoke
Defeat an enemy using a hammer and a sickle
Defeat Don
Defeat an enemy in less than 10 hits
Defeat Xenon on Moon 8
Defeat Xenon on Moon 9
Hover over the reset save button for a bit
Defeat Osha
Reach floor 38 :)
Check out the credits
Defeat B. Casual
Bother Yeremey
Collect all items
Finish the game as Albany
Finish the game as Ramzi
Collect all weapons
Find Cai's soul
Defeat Satan
Brandish Sashka
Brandish Chester's finger
Defeat 38 enemies
Finish the game as Yeremey
Obtain Strawberryclock
Collect all Cibo matto items
Finish the game as Radon
Defeat 138 enemies
Defeat 380 enemies
Admire your complete medal collection!
Medals Earned: 4/19 (70/485 points)
Unlock this medal to learn its secrets!
Reach Layer 15
Reach Layer 14
Lick the Jawbreaker Completely
Reach Layer 13
Reach Layer 12
Reach Layer 11
Reach Layer 10
Reach Layer 9
Reach Layer 8
Reach Layer 7
Reach Layer 6
Reach Layer 5
Reach Layer 4
Reach Layer 3
Reach Layer 2
Reach Layer 1
Medals Earned: 2/20 (15/375 points)
Give the Shotgun a go!
Call in some friends for some massive mayhem.
You've got a pretty good basketball shot!
That's a pretty good kick!
Splat! She's flat for real now.
You have mastered the Tao of Darnell.
Like a Samurai Warrior!
Sometimes a change of scenery is nice.
Heeeeeeeeeeeere's you!
That there crowbar's fixed her up good!
You have crossed the moral event horizon.
You have mastered all the tools of your trade.
The rarest pokemon in Gensokyo.
Kill her 50 times.
Do it like Shotgun Man
Insane! That's over a 100 kills!
Medals Earned: 1/9 (5/205 points)
Rise, ye knight. For that is thy oath and curse.
Through perilous land and trials dire, I'll face my fears...
...and never tire. With unwavering resolve, I'll press on...
...until my love's freedom is finally won!
Blessing of momentum granted.
Blessing of speed granted.
...what a familiar face.
A currency is nothing, but a fleeting illusion.
...and you, brave knight, have proven yourself.
Medals Earned: 1/7 (5/155 points)
Collect your first key card
Finish any level under 30 seconds
Get a kill with a sniper rifle
Get killed by a sawblade
Kill a helish microwave
Gain level 9 access clearance
Medals Earned: 14/52 (140/330 points)
Medals Earned: 11/13 (55/115 points)
Load the game
defeat the woman 10 times
defeat the woman with covfefe
play computer with the woman
Cool the woman down a bit with the fan
Watch all animations
press play on the main menu
Punch the woman in the head
stab woman
shoot woman, you fucking freak
put away important documents with the woman
defeat the woman 1000 times
defeat the woman 100 times
Medals Earned: 2/4 (75/180 points)
Get peak horniness
Pace yourself well enough to get a score of 10,000 or greater.
Look at the credits
See your name in the Hall Of Shame
Medals Earned: 10/10 (355/355 points)
Your first Smackaroo
10 Ants in my PANTS
50 shades of petah
100 tobonkies
250 deaths
500 hand labours
toyota corrolla for 1000
2500 watts
10000 LIVES AT UR HANDS
gal ur punani loud
Medals Earned: 1/11 (5/325 points)
Now everyone knows you like uncensored NG humor.
To get paid? Nah man. To get ice cream.
Save the Day with a full Mayhem Bonus.
Never mind, I wanna go browse Newgrounds dot com instead.
The uh, safety was off there.
2 Left Thumbs would be proud.
Make a big explosion!
Complete the Pacifist Route.
If you do see Peter the Ant by chance, smoosh 'em.
Run out of ammo and die.
You beat the game with TOUCH CONTROLS. I'm AFRAID of you. Just kidding.